I can still remember Sis Au asking me a particular
question that I cannot forget during one of our group discussions. “Who is
Jesus Christ for you, Sheba?” And in that moment, I was not able to answer her.
Good thing she was nice enough to say that I can share to her my answer when I
do have my answer. To have an honest answer that question, I told her that I
think it would be better for me if I
examine myself first and have a reflection on this seemed to be complex but yet
simple and very important question.
So during my long jeepney and bus rides, I asked myself
who Jesus Christ is for me. Then I began to recall the things (great and not so
great) that happened in my almost 27 years of existence.
When I was young, I can remember my parents telling me
not to do particular things or actions because Papa Jesus will be sad. Then, I
remembered telling my siblings and younger cousins not to do the same stuff
because Papa Jesus will be sad.
Then came teenage to adult life and a lot of things
happened. Big and life changing things happened. My dearest Papa died. Then
somebody stole from us. Then, some business problems came leading to having
financial problems. Then came the fire incident at home that made us transfer
to a smaller home. Series of super unfortunate events. I had every reason to be
mad. I had every reason to be angry. And I accepted these reasons and I became
angry. I always asked why did all these things happened to me and to my family.
I thought, we never deserved these. I was angry. I was angry long enough that I
become tired. It is exhausting to be angry to the world. I was just fortunate
to be surrounded my loving people who always guide me. And by the grace of God,
I was able to let go of all these frustrations in life.
I learned how to accept things.
I learned that love is the best luggage I can have in my
heart more than anything else.
I learned how to forgive people.
I learned the importance of treating each one nicely for
all of us has our own fair share of struggles.
I learned to do things for God’s greater glory.
Then I realize who Jesus is in my life.
Then, I was able to give Sis Au my answer to her
question.
Jesus Christ is and will always be my moral compass. Now,
I always look at Jesus whenever I am lost. Whenever I do not know how to deal
with people, things, and circumstances. Especially if there are problems at
work. Good thing Sis Kmae gave me a small book called Didache. I believe that
through it and the Bible, Jesus speaks to me. He never fails to amaze me. Jesus
is the compass I have in making important decisions in my life. He is the
compass that leads me to be in the right direction. I entrust everything to Him
because I know that great things are going to happen to me through Him.
By allowing Jesus to be my compass, I am allowing him to
be the playmaker of my life. According to google, a playmaker is a player in a
team game who leads other players on the same side into a position from which
they could score. I believe that I and my God is in the same team. He is the
playmaker who will lead me to greater things. And I just need to surrender
myself to Him and do my part so that our team will succeed.
Hoping for greater things,
S.
